Messages Of Support Flood In For Survivors Of Prison Sexual Abuse
- Nikki Gloudeman
- December 16, 2016
- The Establishment
“You are brave. You are loved. You are not forgotten. No matter what happens, please remember those three things. The world needs you.”
– Jacklynn
“Healing isn’t easy but it is possible. There is light on the other side. Remember how strong you are, you are a SURVIVOR! Happy Holidays”
– Shannon
“From 1 survivor to another: You’re not forgotten. You’re not alone. We share the same fight. Peace to you and may justice prevail in 2017!”
– Jay
“I am so proud of you for speaking up and working to move forward each day. Know that we are thinking of you and wishing you all the best.”
– Roger
“Today I’m sending you a message of hope and healing for the holidays. We will probably never meet but you’re in my heart! Happy Holidays!”
– Carolyn
In a study conducted by the Bureau of Justice, 4% of state and federal prison inmates and 3.2% of jail inmates reported experiencing sexual victimization by another inmate or facility staff. And yet, despite these chilling figures (and keep in mind, this just accounts for those who reported abuse), rape in prisons is often treated as a punchline in American culture, with “jokes” about assault behind bars common on stand-up-comedy stages, in movies and TV shows, and across the social media universe.
Those reeling from the trauma of assault are not only often deprived of support, but forced to suffer the indignity of mockery — as if their status as a prisoner makes them underserving of the basic human right to not suffer abuse.
To provide the crucial support these prisoners so often lack, Just Detention International (JDI) — a nonprofit founded on the principle that “rape is not part of the penalty” — launched a program in 2010 with a deceptively simple mission: ask people to send messages of encouragement and hope to incarcerated survivors around the holidays. Some messages are submitted online and transcribed onto cards by JDI staff and volunteers, while others are handwritten by supporters ahead of time. The notes, like those shared above, provide essential comfort during dark times, while challenging damning stigmas surrounding rape in prison.
In the years since it launched, the program has grown significantly in scale and scope. This year, the organization has received a record 12,000 messages from a wide array of people, including rape crisis counselors, high school students, police officers, and, not surprisingly, former prisoners. JDI Communications Director Jesse Lerner-Kinglake says the diversity of those who contribute is powerful — “When you get holiday cards from a group of people that includes cops and other survivors, each one offering a bit of kindness, it’s inspiring.”
More than providing support, the initiative helps bolster JDI’s mission to shed light on a crisis that our culture often fails to treat with the appropriate care. When asked about the biggest misconceptions surrounding sexual violence in prison, Lerner-Kinglake answers, “There are so many!”
“People think that the majority of sexual assaults in prison are committed by prisoners, that this violence deters crime, that it is inevitable, that inmates deserve whatever happens to them, and that what goes on behind bars doesn’t matter to people on the outside.
Not one of those beliefs is true. And they are harmful. Most prisoners return to their communities — they are our neighbors, family members, and loved ones. But it’s toxic and misguided on its face to think that a prisoner, just because of their custody status, doesn’t have the same right to be safe as people in the community. Even if a person has a life sentence, they deserve to have dignity and be free of sexual abuse. Rape is not part of a person’s sentence.”
To that end, JDI is committed throughout the year to fighting for laws and policies to end prisoner rape, while making sure survivors get the help they need. Lerner-Kinglake says the organization receives 2,000 letters each year from survivors in prisons and jails across the U.S., and “we respond to each one, providing information about sexual abuse in detention, the healing process, survivors’ rights, and referrals to local organizations that can give counseling.”
It is important to remember this — that the fight for the rights of incarcerated survivors is crucial 365 days a year. At the same time, it makes sense that the mission of JDI is amplified during the holidays, when those behind bars may feel particularly alone, and a simple message can go a long way.
Here’s what some prisoners have said about the impact of the campaign on their lives.
***
“At around 2:45, everyone gets kind of quiet and waits for the officer to pass out mail. What happened next is a testament to the amazing holiday messages sent by JDI’s supporters.
This envelope slides under the door. I started opening the JDI greeting cards and, after about the third one, my eyes started to water. It was as if all of you were here with me in this cell giving me hugs and saying the words I was reading.”
***
“Thanks to all of your volunteers who wrote out messages from supporters. If you send out 10,000 cards, that is an unimaginable amount of love and care for us. This was my fifth consecutive Christmas in solitary confinement, and with the help of people who care, I was able to feel at ease. I made a little tree out of a high-end fashion magazine and set up my cards around it to remind me that I am not forgotten.”
***
“The cards helped me to see myself and who I really am, and all the negative thoughts went away. I look at them whenever I’m feeling down.”
***
“Sometimes I just feel like giving up because I feel utterly alone. But then I’m reminded by JDI supporters that I’m not alone and that I am loved. It makes a MIGHTY difference.”
***
“I felt like I didn’t have any support in prison. But the kindness from JDI’s supporters who shared their love showed me that I had friends who I had never known before. It helped me deal with the pain. The cards are something that I will never forget.”
***
Nathan is now out of prison; this year, he has himself written dozens of messages to incarcerated survivors.
Want to send your own words of hope to survivors? Click here.
Originally posted here