I was raped by the lieutenant not once but many times. He threatened me many times with placing me in the Special Housing Unit until my release, and told me he would make my stay very hard and uneasy by getting inmates and other corrections officers to harass me. He was abusive and violent with me when I wouldn’t want to perform sexual acts. This went on from May to August of 2019, when I worked as an orderly.
To this day I still feel scared and uneasy. I am afraid of men abusing me, assaulting me, hurting me, raping me. My PTSD has gotten worse. I don’t get much sleep. Hearing the keys of the officers scares me. It takes me back to the noise the key made when he would approach me. I knew then it was time to do what he ordered me to do or suffer the consequences.
I remember he would break into a sweat under his lips and on top of his forehead when he was very upset or violent. He used to say, “I have control over you. I am the king of the jungle around here. I wear the badge of Lieutenant.” Meaning he had power to do what he wanted.
I have major depression, am on edge, and have uncontrolled diabetes. This has affected me in a major way, emotionally and mentally. I need help, help that this prison hasn’t given me — the help of adequately trained professionals. I desperately need to deal with all my issues. The assault has affected me in ways most people could not understand. It has affected my general health. It spirals and may cause irreversible damage.
I am a survivor of rape and sexual assault.
I have been retaliated against by lieutenants and corrections officers at the prison, and by inmates after the lieutenant was walked off the compound in 2019. I was transferred to a new facility, and the warden here brushes my concerns under the rug. My mental health and emotional state are at a breaking point.